Ah well, I tried my best…

You know what’s weird? When you order pants (and by "pants" I mean underwear, for the benefit of those of you in the States) from a catalogue or website, and they come on a weeny little pant-sized hanger. WHY? Seriously, do people hang them up with these? Are there people out there with closets filled with neatly colour-codes pants? Should I start doing this? I mean, I know my wardrobes are all fixed now, with their shiny new doors and also shelves that Terry built inside them (a guilty conscience, perhaps?) but that’s a level of anal retentiveness that hadn’t occurred even to me. Hmmm.

In addition to the new pants, I also got me a pair of skinny jeans today. Oh, and y’know, these.  *whistles innocently*

There was actually a whole drama with the shoes. Turns out the SWINES didn’t actually have them in the colour shown on the website at all, so I’ve had to make like one of those crazy, fussy ladies who used to annoy the hell out of me when I used to sell things on eBay ("What is the exact measurement of the area between the elbow and the third button down?" "Can you guarantee that no pet has ever so much as looked at these jeans?" "I know your listing says the item comes from a non-smoking home, but could the jacket ever have come into contact with a wisp of smoke outside the house, or has it literally been wrapped in cotton wool and hermetically sealed?") by sending a succession of emails to the company (who, by the way, win the Amber award for customer service hands down), asking them to describe, if they would, the exact colour of these babies.

Wasn’t that a long sentence! Now you know why I am a writer!

Anyway, it’s done now. Last night I dreamt that I had secretly bought a pair of shoes which I was desperately trying to keep hidden from Terry, but the shoes kept emitting this awful "Weee-waaw-wee-waaw-weee-waaaw" sound at top volume. When I woke up, turns out the guy across the road’s car alarm had been going for an HOUR. And kept on going for ANOTHER HOUR. But God, my psyche is so simplistic, isn’t it? Even my unconscious mind is predictable…

1 Comment

  • jen says:

    I LOVE the dream-that is absolutely hilarious!

    And, hurrah(!!) for the buying of the shoes! I was thinking about them earlier actually, wishing that I too could fit into gorgeous shoes, let alone buy them.Ah well.

    Re: pant hangers. You know, that's soemthing that's always puzzled me as well.

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