Rubin writes…


Actually, I’m going to just come clean: I got TWO ponkies, and the reason I got two ponkies was that the first one… well, the first one was an IMPOSTOR Ponky. For real.

I blame myself. My Norma had gone to “Ikea” with A&T, and she brought back this dude:


Now, I admit it, I got carried away. There was a rush to judgement. Soon as I seen it: pink, big ears, smilin’, I was just like, “Oh man, a PONKY!” I couldn’t BELIEVE it, and, well, basically I was right not to believe it, because it wasn’t a freakin ponky at all – it was a RABBIT.

Yeah, yeah, I know what y’all are thinkin. Yoos are all, “easy mistake to make, Rubinman – I mean, who HASN’T seen a rabbit and thought it was a donkey?” Well, sure, YOU LOT could easily make the mistake, but for a professional like myself to confuse a rabbit with a PONKY – well, that’s just shameful.

I mean, it’s not the Ponky Rabbit’s fault. By the time I realised he was Not a Ponky, I’d been throwin that dude all over the place, chasin him, playing with him – me n’ him were like THAT. So I decided to keep him, and everything was cool, and then today… today Terry gets in his “car” and drives away, and the next thing I know, he’s back with THIS:


Now, THAT’s a Ponky for ya. That there is a REAL Ponky. If ever you need to know whether you got yourself a PONKY or a rabbit, you just check out this here picture and that’ll tell you for sure. (And don’t say I’m not good to you. Where else could you get free advice on Ponky-spotting? Only from the Rubinman…) I couldn’t BELIEVE it! I mean, on Friday I had NO PONKIES and now I have TWO! I bet there’s not a single one of you can say that. Obviously Terry had been Ponky-huntin’. Who woulda thunk it? I had no idea he even knew where to find a ponky. Hee! I totally rule. Me an m’ponkies.

Don’t even LOOK at my ponkies. They’re MY ponkies. Rubinman does not share!

  1. I am a little concerned for you Rubin, man. You second ponky, the one that isn’t a rabbit, does look some what like a wort-hog, complete with the cloven hoofs and everything. I could be wrong, what with being along way off, in Australia and everything, but I still say pig, not donkey.

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