Bah, Humbug

Well, folks, it’s less than a month until Christmas – let the fun begin! (And by “Let the fun begin” I mean, “Let Terry and I begin hemorrhaging money as we frantically try and stockpile random pieces o’crap gifts for our nearest and dearest whilst still having enough money to be able to live, and ohmygod it’s Christmas! We will have to actually LEAVE THE HOUSE and go to parties, and WHAT WILL I WEAR? I have nothing to wear. Nothing. SEND CLOTHES. Also: ponies)

Anyway, as it’s almost Christmas and we’re now poorer than the poorest of church mice, it stands to reason that my car will choose this time of year to break down randomly, so that’s what happened today. I’d popped down to Asda to start buying those Christmas gifts, and yes, OK, to see if they had that dress in yet that was in Heat magazine two weeks ago, but which has never actually appeared in Asda ever, and actually? I don’t think that dress even exists. I think they just made it up to taunt me. Damn you, George at Asda, DAMN YOU TO HELL.

But I digress. It was as I was leaving the car park that the car decided to splutter and die. “Splutter!” said the car. “Die!” I managed to get it started again, but then spent the rest of the drive home squealing like a crazy person every time I had to slow down, in case it would die again and refuse to start. I have no idea what’s wrong with it, but I’ll bet it’s expensive, whatever it is. For the moment I’m going to go with my “the car was cold. And tired!” theory. Don’t tell me different, because I don’t want to know.

Needless to say, this has not got December off to a very good start, and God, December hasn’t even started yet.  Don’t get me wrong, I love Christmas day itself – I just hate the month that precedes it, with it’s frantic consumerism and wardrobe dilemmas. Bah, humbug…

What I should do about this state of affairs: Start writing novel. Become rich and famous. Get car fixed. Buy pony.

What I am actually going to do about this state of affairs: Go to bed. Sleep.

What I will do tomorrow: Get up early. Take Rubin for healthy, bracing walk in the early morning air. Feel virtuous. Complete days’ work by lumchtime. Write novel. For real.


8 Comments

  • Erin says:

    *g*

    You weren’t low on petrol, were you? ;)

  • Amber says:

    You make a good point, Erin… It *was* a little low on petrol, but not so low that it wouldn’t normally start. (It’s started on a lot less, put it that way :) ) But maybe it was cold AND hungry? I’m going to add it to my list of “things that could be wrong with the car but won’t cost me much money to fix”, anyway. Keep your fingers crossed…

  • Erin says:

    *g* Ooh, I’m going to go all ‘expert’ on you for a sec, because I worked in roadside assistance for a few years (like the AA, I worked the call centre in the Oz version).

    Try not to let the tank go under 1/4 full on the gauge, because over time, the gunge in petrol builds up in your tank. Your gauge might read as if it’s got a way to go, but the reality of what’s in your tank might be less. Also, if you get into the habit of running on empty (yeah, I used to do it too ;), the crap starts running into your fuel lines and can do a bit of damage to your engine (omg, I sound like my dad!).

    Here’s some fun trivia for you.. The most common way that a car low on fuel will act up, is sputtering as it goes around a corner! I used to have fabulous call centre conversations like this all the time:

    ‘My car’s broken down! Grr! Argh! Diediedieputridscum!’

    ‘Ok, sir.. tell me what happened’

    ‘Everything was fine, I was driving, and then I was going around a corner, and everything locked up, and now it won’t start. This stupid car is a piece of crap, I hate you all, diediedie!’

    ‘Ok sir, can you tell me what your fuel gauge says?’

    ‘Oh. Um.’

    ‘Don’t worry sir, I’ll send out a roadside car with some fuel.’

  • Amber says:

    Ha! Erin, you have no idea how pleased this has made me! I try not to run the car when the fuel is low, but Terry does it ALL the time – it’s like some weird male thing where he’ll try and see how little fuel he can get by on. And if he borrows my car and I tell him it needs petrol, he’ll be all “No way – miles left in it yet!” and he’ll drive it anyway. This has been annoying me for a long time, because my car is my baby – I am SO making him read what you’ve said!

  • Erin says:

    Hehehe :) Glad I could help!! ;)

  • Timbo says:

    Wow. Aren’t bloggers useful?
    Not me though. I have nothing useful to add other than “nice blog you have here, me like!”

    See, not useful at all.

  • Amanda says:

    I was going to say exactly what Erin did – except mine was more along the lines of “well, I know my car hates it when its cold and I’ve let the fuel get low.” And this is probably overkill, but try pouring in HEET or some similar thing when you fill up in the winter months. It made my lamented (may he rest in peace) car very happy from October to March when I lived in the frozen north.

  • katie says:

    bit random, just to say thanks to see you’ve also noticed that they don’t seem to seel that dress from Heat magazine everywhere, i must have been in about 5 different stores…so annoying!!

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