Wake Me Up Before You Go Go

So, I need to find out how to become a "morning person". How will I do this, do you think?

At the moment, you see, I’m definitely not a morning person. And it’s kind of irritating, to be honest, because I’m not so much a "night" person, either. What am I, then? Well, a LAZY PERSON basically. Man, I love my bed. I’d be in my bed all day if I could be. Oh no, wait – I already am, aren’t I? I FAIL.

I exaggerate, of course. Yeah, I know, it’s not like me, is it? I don’t lie in bed all morning just most of it , but I do sleep later than most people, and up until now, I have been convincing myself that this was not only an acceptable thing to do, but was, in fact, the RIGHT thing to do. "I deserve it," I told myself. "All those years of working seven days per week and getting up at 6.30am every day in life mean that I am OWED sleep. And this is why I work from home, after all: so that I don’t have to get up at the butt-crack of dawn every morning, and, instead, get to lie around like a giant sloth, getting up when I want, going to bed when I want, and just generally pleasing myself. It’s all about ME, baby! And also: am a rebel! A renegade! Am challenging the conventions of society with my giant sloth-like behavior! Or something."

See, I’m starting to talk myself out of this whole "becoming a morning person" thing already. Gah.

Anyway, all of this came to a head on Monday morning, when I was forced out of bed at stupid o’clock to await the arrival of the plumber. And the weird thing was that once the initial shock of being awake in the Land of Seven O’Clock (a land I have not visited for quite some time) had passed, I really started to dig the whole thing. The work that I’d normally have still been doing in the evening? Finished by lunchtime. (In fairness, this was partly because I’d done some of it the night before. I mean, I don’t really lie in bed all day.) The rest of the day? Lay before me, an unblemished page, just waiting to be written on. Why, I could write a book with all those extra hours! I could train for a marathon! (Note: totally not going to do that.) I could SHOP! My whole life would be revolutionized by all of those lovely, lovely extra hours!

And so it was that I decided that, from that point on, I would be A Morning Person.

So I set the alarm for 7am and went to bed, dreaming all all of those extra hours I would soon be enjoying. Then I woke up when the alarm went off, thought, "Screw you, extra hours – you’re not that good" and went back to sleep.

The next day? The same thing. The day after that? Ditto. Today? Well, you get the picture.

I just can’t do it. I can’t seem to become A Morning Person, no matter how hard I try – and trust me, I have tried. I’ve even tried putting the alarm clock in another room, or hiding it last thing at night, but that doesn’t work either, because even although I’m not generally awake in the land of Early Morning, when the alarm goes off, I become possessed of an unearthly speed and dexterity which allows me to fly from the bed like lightning, switch off the alarm and be back under the covers before I’ve even fully opened my eyes. It’s a shame that’s not some kind of Olympic sport, actually, because I WOULD WIN. I’d try getting Terry to hide the alarm, but then he’d just have to lie there listening to it while I fumbled around in the dark for ages, and I don’t think he’d like that because he’s NOT trying to become A Morning Person, and he probably wouldn’t appreciate becoming one by proxy…

So, anyway, this is my dilemma. How shall it be solved, though? Well, at the moment I’m thinking it will be solved, like most things in life, by me buying stuff. Specifically, I’m thinking I should buy one of those alarm clocks that makes a cup of coffee for you.  Because, I know my problem isn’t staying up – it’s just getting up. If I can actually persuade myself to haul ass out of the bed, I will be feeling fine by the time I hit the shower. It’s the "getting out of bed" bit I fail with, and this is the case no matter how early I go to bed or how well I sleep: I’m not actually tired, you see – just heart rotten lazy. So maybe if I buy an alarm-clock-that-also-makes-coffee I would wake to the smell of caffeine, and because I can’t resist the caffeine, I’d be motivated to get up and drink it? Or maybe I could just buy a new pair of shoes every day, but only at 7am?

Ideas? Suggestions?

Hi, I'm Amber. I'm a full-time fashion/shoe blogger from the UK, and this is the story of my life, my clothes, and the International Man of Mystery Next Door. You can read more from me at my other blogs, The Fashion Police and Shoeperwoman, and you can follow me on Bloglovin' here.

16 Comments

  • Reply February 7, 2008

    Orla

    This is a pain I know all too well, but I unfortunately have classes to attend so getting up past 7.30 is not an option. at all.

    So. As a chronic late sleeper, i suggest gradually earlier alarms. If you usually get up at, say, 11, go for 10 for a week, then 9 and so on. Your body will get trained into enjoying more hours of morning light and you'll hate sleeping late.

    In theory at least!

  • Reply February 7, 2008

    Caroline

    I'm not a morning person either. At ALL. Seriously, if I could actually LIVE in a bed I would.

    The Land of Seven O'Clock – did that come to the top of the Magic Faraway Tree at some point? (Or does no-one else have a clue what I'm talking about, which is more likely…)

  • Reply February 7, 2008

    Amber

    Orla – I do think you're probably onto something there. I remember when I first became self-employed, and was used to having to work in an office. I just COULDN'T sleep late, even on the weekends, because my body was so used getting up early. And, probably, because I was constantly thinking, "Oh my God, what have I DONE? How will I pay my mortgage every month without a guaranteed income. Aaargh!"

    I should probably also say that I'm not quite at the 10/11am stage, which is good. It's more like 8.30/9am, but then it takes me an hour to get myself showered and dressed etc, so if I could start getting up at about 7-ish, it would be a big help…

    Caroline – I am insanely excited that you mentioned the Magic Faraway Tree. Silky! Moonface! The Saucepan Man! Oh, how I loved them all!

    And actually, I have TRIED living in bed. I mean, that's why I bought a laptop, to be honest. It becomes very sore on the butt after not very long at all, though. Dang.

  • Reply February 7, 2008

    Steph

    That's my problem too, chronic laziness. And I've just never been a morning person; even when I was back at school and not remotely lazy, I'd still have trouble with the whole 'getting up' aspect. Part of it is also (I know you'll sympathise here Amber) being obscenely cold all the time and not wanted to get out of my lovely warm bed.

    Luckily for me, I've got an illness that makes me tired all the time, so people have yet to spot that it's actually laziness that keeps me in bed, even when I'm feeling fine.

  • Reply February 7, 2008

    Toni

    I'm a natural morning person and I've been sat here trying to put into words how such a thing is possible, but all I have come up with is "some people are, some people aren't". Which is about as much use as a chocolate fireguard, but I get points for trying… right?

    /useless comment

  • Reply February 7, 2008

    Jenny

    I'm actually a morning person too. Sorry, not trying to rub it in :-) I think Toni is right. You either are or you're not. But on the downside I'm falling asleep by 9.00 in the evening and that's not so good. Oh god I love the Folk of the Faraway Tree too. The bit where the Angry Pixie throws the ink over Connie . . . ha ha.

  • Reply February 7, 2008

    Hayley

    There's an alarm clock at Uncommon Goods that I have been thinking would be great if I couldn't get up in the morning. Unfortunately for me, once the alarm goes off, I can never get back to sleep. But it might work for you. Here's a link to the actual clock. http://www.uncommongoods.com/item/item.jsp?itemId…

    After you hit the snooze once, when it goes off again, it will roll off the nightstand or wherever it is and keep going until you find it and shut it off.

  • Reply February 7, 2008

    Mel

    I am no good at getting up and also no good at staying up. I don't feel like a person until at least three hours after I get up. I hate it, but as yet haven't found any way to fix it.

  • Reply February 7, 2008

    Katie

    I wake up earlier than I need to because I find that I'm more productive in the morning. Those dirty dishes from dinner last night that I was too lazy to wash? Done! Take the trash out? Piece of cake! Now I need to see about working out in the morning, though that may be a bit much to ask of myself!

  • Reply February 8, 2008

    Shinykatie

    I know for a fact that you're not lazy – you work like a crazy person. But hearing you say that makes me feel better – because I think exactly the same thing about myself. I'm a morning person (if only because I'm rubbish at night), but I just love lounging around in bed and I really struggle to get up.

    I've got one of those wakeup lights, and that really helps to make getting out of bed less traumatic. Plus, you wake up naturally and can lie there dozing for a bit.

    But, speaking as someone who felt guilty every day as a freelancer and who now has to haul her arse out of bed every day to go into the office, I have to tell you to stop worrying about it and enjoy your freedom! I really wish I had! You get twice as much done working at home anyway, so you're entitled to loaf about a bit if you feel like it.

    Here endeth the sermon!

  • Reply February 9, 2008

    Kristabella

    I have the same issues. I love how much you can get done if you get up early, but I just can't. Especially on weekends. I want my sleep. And I want a lot of it. And the dishes can sit in the sink for another week.

  • Reply February 10, 2008

    diane

    I agree with Katie that you shouldn't feel guilty and that you *obviously* are very conscientious.

    BUT I agree with you that getting up early & getting stuff done can feel great, and I've been training myself to get up about 7.40 (why 7.40? 7.30 is just that bit too early…)

    You really have to be determined, and also I make the bed once I'm up, so there's no going back. Terry might not like that so much though…

    It's funny cos I haaaaaaaaate going to bed, I find it so so boring, but then in the morning I never want to leave it. But like most things, it's okay once you get used to it.

    Another tip is to gradually change the time you get up by 10-15 mins so as not to shock your system too much.
    Can be a bit slow, though, and I suspect you might be as patient as I am… ;)

  • Reply February 11, 2008

    Jenna Maria

    As someone who has to be teaching at 7:07am, getting up early isn't an option for me. I am not a natural morning person, but have begun to make a habit of it, even on the weekends.
    I think that the gradual wave of one week at 10, the next at 9, etc. might be effective. A coffee pot with an automatic timer is wonderful. Placing it within reach of your bed is even better. (I've not had to do that, but why not? It's all right there in reach! I may start.)
    I also have an alarm in the TV which is set to go off at 5am. The weather/news comes on and I'll get up just to shut it off. BUT, if I didn't have to, I'd enjoy the time to just relax!

    It is great to be finished with work by 2pm every day. I then can do what I wish with my afternoon and evening. Maybe just one or two days of early rising a week would give you a few early end times. I would sleep in if I could though too!

  • Reply October 27, 2008

    Brandon

    I'm in the Army and have to get up every morning at 0515. I am okay with this considering I have always been more or less a morning person. I don’t know if it’s something you can teach yourself to become as much as it is something you just do naturally. Being a good morning person has allot to do with your internal clock keeping good time. I find if and when I wake up just before my alarm goes off every morning I’m far more awake and chipper then if I wait for it to go off. How do I do this I’m not sure but I think it might have something to do with willing yourself to wake up when the time is right. Like something in your sub conches saying get up you Well Have to run to PT Hope this helped.I'm in the Army and have to get up every morning at 0515. I am okay with this considering I have always been more or less a morning person. I don’t know if it’s something you can teach yourself to become as much as it is something you just do naturally. Being a good morning person has allot to do with your internal clock keeping good time. I find if and when I wake up just before my alarm goes off every morning I’m far more awake and chipper then if I wait for it to go off. How do I do this I’m not sure but I think it might have something to do with willing yourself to wake up when the time is right. Like something in your sub conches saying get up you Well Have to run to PT Hope this helped.

  • Reply October 27, 2008

    Brandon

    my bad lol

  • Reply June 5, 2014

    Selina

    I’m not a morning person. I have no answers for you, sorry

Leave a Reply