Yo, dudes, s’up? Rubinman in da house. Yes, THE Rubinman! We’ll sort out the autographs and stuff later, but for now, listen up…
So, it’s like, Amber is "busy" today, so it was left up to me, Rubin, to come and tell yoos that Amber’s blawgs, The Fashion Police and Hey, Dollface, are, like, nominated for some kind of "awards". No, I don’t understand why either, ‘cos it’s not like they even have any pictures of me on them or anything, you know? And also, while we’re on the subject, why doesn’t the Rubinman’s blawg get "awards"? That, like, makes no sense, AT ALL.
Anyways. Yoos should all totally go and vote for those blawgs (they’re, under "fashion" and "beauty", cos, it’s like, that’s what they’re about?), and I’ll tell yoos for why: yoos should vote for them because if you don’t, Amber’ll be all whiny and like, "Boo hoo, nobody loves me!" and the Rubinman’ll be the one that’ll have to pick up the pieces. As usual. Also, if yoos don’t vote for them, I’ll personally come over there and bite yoos on the bum, and don’t think I wont do it.
So, yeah, that’s alls I got to say right now. It’s kind of a shame because I’m guessing that as soon as yoos saw my picture on the page yoos were all, "Thank Dog, it’s an entry from the Rubinman! Now we don’t have to read this crap about The Famous Five and Amber’s stupid hair no more, and we can get to read us some REAL blawgs, that are written by a WOLF and everything!" And then it just turned out that alls I was here for was to tell yoos to vote for them stupid blawgs. I feel sorry for yoos, I really do. I’ll still totally bite yoos on the bums, though, remember that.