Barking Mad

Rubin writes…

Basically, I’ve been barking like a madman EVERY SINGLE morning. I start about half an hour before A&T normally get up, and I WILL NOT STOP until they haul ass out of bed and come and play with me. It’s driving them absolutely CRAZY. If they try and get up earlier, in an effort to thwart me, I just work out what the new time is and start barking half an hour before THAT. The way things are going, they’d need to get up at 5.30am to beat me just now. Hee!

The thing is – they CAN’T ignore me. I mean, they’ve TRIED – don’t think they haven’t. But it’s like, would YOU be able to ignore the scary wolf that was barkin at YOUR door? Remember what happened to Little Red Riding Hood’s ol grandma before yoos answer that one…

I particularly like doing it on a Saturday morning, when Amber’s been working all week and is thinking she can get to sleep late. “Aaaamblller!” I shout. “Teeeerrreee! Doggie crap in here for you to clean up! Come and geeeet it while it’s hot!” Then they come thundering down the stairs, all bleary-eyed and wild-haired to scold me, and I’m like, “What? Me? Barking? No, I wasn’t barking. Are you sure you’re feeling OK? It’s just, you’re looking a bit tired. Maybe you should try and get some more sleep?” Hee!

Belly

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