CUSHIONS

(Rubin is a dog with a blog. This post was written by him.)

I’m in disgrace. Again. No one’s talking to me. They’re still feeding me (feeding me DOGFOOD) and taking me walks and stuff, but there’s definitely an “atmosphere”. It all seems to be stemming from The Cushions.

Last Saturday we went round to see my Norma and John, and Norma had growed two cushions. Amber decided to bring them home with us, and they’ve been living on the couch ever since. Amber kept looking at them and touching them and stuff, so naturally I took agin the pair of them.

Well. On Monday night, I go down the stairs and I see The Cushions. Well, I don’t need to tell you what happened. I was only down there on my own for a few minutes, but by the time They came down I had:

1) pulled one of the cushions off the couch
2) peed on it
3) Jumped onto the couch – the CREAM couch- with my muddy paws
4) left mud all over it
5) been out to the garden and collected more mud
6) brought it back into the house with me
7) put it all over the CUSHIONS

Amber went MENTAL. So did Terry, but he’s always mental. I got put in the Sin Bin for ten minutes. When I came out though, I bided my time then when they were out of the room I went and peed against the guitar that lives under the stairs. Amber didn’t find out until the next morning, and by then she hadn’t caught me in the act, so she couldn’t give me a row. Hee!

The next day I dug me a hole. It’s my best ever hole, I’m really quite proud off it. It’s a hole in the LAWN rather than in the dirt. GO me! Then I took Terry’s pen and burried it in the hole. They didn’t find it until the next day. How I laughed! That night I secretly peed against the guitar again. Sometimes I amaze even myself…

2 Comments

  • Louise says:

    Hi Rubanman, Thanks sooooo much for your blog, I have been reading it, you know, at work, like your not supposed to and literally crying with laugher, completely un-controllable. Now my stomach muscles hurt. I can relate to many of your stories with my own dogs, but thankfully not the wee ones so much. One of my girls is a bichon cross, and she seems to have some similar barking traits!!

    Thanks again, I’ll be giggling for the rest of the day I’m sure, mostly because of the tennis ball with legs!!

  • RUBIN says:

    Louise, dude, you are welcome. It’s my ambition to make someone laugh so much they actually pee themselves, so it’s good to know I’m gettin there…

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