The Coat: a cautionary tale

So, a few weeks ago I became ever so slightly obsessed with a coat. As soon as I laid eyes on it I was all, “That coat will be mine!”, so what I did was, I did NOTHING. And it sold out. Everywhere. I know because I, er, emailed the manufacturer to beg them ask them if they’d be getting any more of them in.

“No coat!” said the manufacturer. “Cannot have! Sucks to be you! Ner-ner-ner-ner!”

Clearly, it was just not meant to be, so I decided to forget all about the coat, but before I did, I decided to search eBay obsessively for it, praying as I did so. And I found it! Only, not really, because the coat I found was one size bigger than the size I usually take.

“Will not buy,” I told myself firmly. “Stupid to even look at coat which will be too big. That way heartache lies. Will not even add to Watch List, so cannot be tempted!”

So I added The Coat to my Watch List.

A few days later, I checked up on it and lo! The Coat had now been bid up to an astronomical price – one that was, in fact, higher than it had sold for in the store. And sure, the coat was brand new with tags, but even so! Even so, people!

“Stupid!” I said smugly. “Idiots, bidding up Coat to crazy high price! Glad I’m having no part in that! Forgetting all about it now. Right now. Want, though!”

So I continued to watch the coat like a stalker.

“Buy coat,” said Terry. “I will give you difference between retail price and crazy inflated eBay price,” said Terry. “Then you will shut up about coat, OK?”

“Nooo!” said I. “Stupid to involve husband in buying of overpriced coat which, although crazy expensive is also investment, really. And actually, not that expensive, when you come to think of it. In fact, is still way less than most people pay for coats every day! OMG, is bargain!”

So, the coat arrived today. And yeah, it’s too big.  And kind of completely different from how I was expecting it to look. I was thinking I could pad it out with jumpers, though, maybe carry Rubin around inside it in manner of kangaroo. Or I could just re-sell it. One thing is for sure, though: I am totally banning myself from buying things online now, because if I do decide to sell The Coat, it will be the eleventy-first thing I’ve had to return this week month alone on account of it not fitting right, and that? Is seriously starting to get on my nerves. I mean, I seem to spend all of my time trailing to the post office and I hate it at the post office.

[photo removed because I realised it's a full moon tonight and my skin is too thin to post photos of myself on the internet when there's a full moon - d'oh!]

Oh, and the “cautionary tale” referenced in the title? Avoid the internet when buying your clothes. Seriously.

10 Comments

  • Emmao414 says:

    I love and now want your coat!! It fabulous! Such a pity that you say it doesnt fit, cos it really looks fantastic on you.

    And the infamous boots, I have had to stop myself going back and getting those ones too, they are hawt :)

  • Gorgeous outfit! I actually tend to buy coats slightly bigger just for the fact that I can layer more underneath, which is necessary during the winter months here. Think of it as being practical! And not obsessive!

    <abbr>Amanda Nicole´s last blog post..back to the forties</abbr>

  • Henri Hunter says:

    ooohhh, those boots are yumptious….. neediness gone into overdrive !

  • Kathleen says:

    That coat is cute!

    I like buying handbags and accessories online, but I agree that buying clothes online is hit-or-miss. And then I hate the idea of having to pay for return shipping especially when I got free shipping for the entire order. Bleh. Now I have a lot of pieces sitting in my closet that I may donate or sell on eBay.

  • Danielle says:

    That coat is cute! But you're right, it is too large for you. THe boots are fabulous, though. I've been looking for a pair of over the knee boots that I can afford for ages now.

  • Carrie says:

    Ah! I missed the pic! boo! Post again! Can't wait to see The Coat. Can you take it to a tailor to have it taken in?

    <abbr>Carrie´s last blog post..Lovely Lace from Karen Millen</abbr>

  • Steph says:

    Oh, I missed the picture too :( I'm always wary about buying clothes online (I still do it all the time anyway) because I seem to have a freakish body that nothing fits properly…

  • Nicky says:

    show us the coat, SHOW US THE COAT!!!!!!

  • Caroline says:

    Yes, please show us the coat!

    I've nominated you for the honest blogger award. Just for fun – if you ever want a relatively easy meme-style thingy to inspire you! Details on my blog.

    <abbr>Caroline´s last blog post..Honest Blogger Award</abbr>

  • Natasha says:

    After an exhausting search that threatened to literally drive me crazy, I finally managed to buy a coat two days ago, and now I'm absolutely in love with it. The experience was so stressful I was forced to treat myself to a completely unnecessary pair of purple stiletto boots, just to relieve the tension :)

    Why are the coats on the market so bad this season? The fabric quality of almost everything seems very poor!

    I want to see your coat! Put the picture back up! Pleaseeee!

    Judging by everyone else's comments, you look lovely in it.

    <abbr>Natasha´s last blog post..Lasagna</abbr>

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