The Season of Three Outfits Per Day

Well, I’ve kinda sucked at updating this blog this week, haven’t I? I’ve been busy. And OK, also lazy, but mostly busy, stock-piling blog posts like a demented thing so I can go on holiday in December and not, you know, totally lose my livelihood or anything.

Yes, this would be the winter holiday I first started talking about back in August. The one I’ve done nothing about booking yet, but which will hopefully be booked within the next couple of weeks because seriously people, I am done with winter already. And yes, I know it’s technically still “Autumn” (is it?) but it’s not like you’d notice here in the Land O’Amber, which is a cold, harsh land where any temperature below “boiling” is deemed unacceptable to me.

I. Hate. This. Time. Of. Year.  Hate it. Even getting dressed becomes a problem at this time of year. I mean, take Monday, for instance. On Monday, I got up, showered, dressed, walked to my desk, sat down… and then twenty minutes later I got back up again, walked back to the bedroom, removed every single item of clothing from the wardrobe and proceeded to drape them about my person, in a bid to fight off the cold that was seeping into my bones. I had socks hanging off my ears, sweaters on my legs – you name it.

Then, half an hour later, I was back, removing all of the aforementioned items and donning my “dog walking outfit”, which consists of the kind of clothes you don’t mind getting utterly ruined by mud and squelchy horrible leaves and stuff. I looked absolutely ridiculous. Seriously, I looked like some kind down-on-her-luck Arctic explorer, and I will continue to look like this until about May next year, because I just cannot stand to be outside for the length of time it takes to walk the dog dressed in anything other than fifteen layers. I would seriously wear a balaclava if I thought no one would see me.

The problem with this, though? People do see me. At the end of our street, for instance, I encountered a young woman who looked like she was walking to work. She was wearing trousers, a fine-knit cardigan and court shoes with bare feet. No coat. No hat. No thermal long johns. As she passed me (me in my dog-walking outfit, and hardly able to move my arms because I was wearing so many layers), we both slowed down and stared openly at each other, each of us wondering if we had somehow slipped into another dimension in which the climate was totally different from the one we’d just left.

Then this morning, as Terry and I drove out of the street, on our way to the gym? We passed a young girl in jeans and a t-shirt. A T-SHIRT. WITH BARE ARMS. In OCTOBER. Aaaargh! The Others, they never cease to amaze me.  And I meanwhile, am now on three outfits per day:

Gym clothes
“Normal” clothes
Dog Walking Clothes
And back to “Normal Clothes”, although sometimes with additional layers as required.

It’s exhausting just keeping up with the outfit changes, seriously. I was not meant for this climate.

And this is why I will be going on holiday this December, even if it kills me (and if the last plane journey I took is anything to go by, there’s a good chance it will…). Right now, that holiday cannot come quick enough…


19 Comments

  • Terry says:

    You forgot to mention the house is so warm I have to walk around in my shorts half of the time :P

  • Hayley says:

    It's at this point where I admit that I try as long as possible to wear short sleeves. I tell myself that as long as I'm wearing a scarf, there is no need for a jacket. Where this comes from, I don't know, but it's obviously not rational and is probably why I'm sick.

    • Amber says:

      Ah, yes, I think this is possibly why so many people here do the "short sleeves" in winter thing, too – they're probably just hoping that if they keep pretending its warm, it actually will be!

  • Oh my god! I, too, go through a ridiculous amount of wardrobe changes a day: gym clothes, normal clothes, then when 6pm hits, stretchy pants. And if I go out at all, factor in a more socially acceptable outfit. Our climate is up and down like a see-saw right now, so I also have battles with turning the fireplace on and off all day. Dave, on the other hand, is like Terry, and goes around in shorts everyday saying things like, "It's ROASTING in here!" Most likely just to get a withering look from me.

    <abbr>Amanda Nicole´s last blog post..what was I calling about again?</abbr>

    • Amber says:

      I'm actually starting to run out of socially acceptable outfits because it's just the gym clothes/dog walking clothes/trying to stay warm clothes in constant rotation. How I wish summer, when I get to dress like a "normal" person at least some of the time!

  • Steph says:

    I thought it was just me! Last week when I actually had to venture outdoors I wore so many layers I couldn't bend at the waist, and I had my scarf pulled up over my nose and mouth like a ninja. My cruel, cruel father tricked me into moving into a house without central heating, so I am going to spend the time from now, until… ooh, about July, huddled around an electric fire, while he complains that it's too hot.

    Oh, the curse of 'feeling the cold'…

    • Amber says:

      Ha, sounds exactly like me! Terry, meanwhile, is always boiling, so he has to sit around in shorts in the winter when he's inside the house, while I jack the heating up as high as it can go and wear all my clothes at once!

  • hiun_na says:

    Neither i know how to dress at this time of the year. i ve got an urge to wear piles of clothes every morning ,but it usually turns out to be rather sunny and warm day( i live in a warm climate).I keep thinking it is because i wake up earlier than most students and at that time of the it is colder.

    My other problem is that my bf is not really impressed of me wearing his inside-home-only clothes on top of mine. i believe he prefered summer when we wear as few clothes as possible.

  • Nina says:

    That reminds me that just some days ago (it was freezing cold, natch) I saw two girls walking around the city center in FLIP-FLOPS, I am not kidding. Brr!

    <abbr>Nina´s last blog post..Life & Lyrics</abbr>

  • Mhairi says:

    Hey Amber

    I thought it was just me that was looking for a "summer holiday" now that it is the officially the cold season although I never remembered the warm season we were promised with all the global warming (clue is in the name). Just a pity that my passport was about to expire or I would definately be booking a wee trip away.

    Enjoy your holiday, and if you got any space in your suitcase let me know and I will tag along.

    • Amber says:

      Tell me about it! I think if we'd actually *had* a summer, the winter wouldn't seem nearly as bad, but we managed to bypass it completely this year – gah!

  • Araceli says:

    Again, come to México, with our economy it would be pretty cheap, (1euro=18.80pesos) and if you visit Guadalajara you´d be glad to see that in the worst day of winter all we natives need is a cardigan, and that´s ONLY IF you go out early in the morning, the rest of the day bare arms and legs and feet would do. (although the feet part not recomended)

  • Amy says:

    I'm the 'Terry' of my relationship. I'm always telling my wife to put a sweater on. I'm so mean.

    <abbr>Amy´s last blog post..When I close my eyes</abbr>

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