The Friday Five! It’s back!

Hey, folks, guess who’s back? Back again! The Friday Five’s back! Tell your friends!

Yes, I created a monster ‘cos no one wants to see Amber no more, with her constant whining about the cold, the cold, and OMG, did I mention how much I hate THE COLD? So in a bid to breathe new life into the old blawg, and give a girl who spends all day, every day sitting in a darkened room looking at pictures of shoes on the Internet something to write about, I’m bringing back The Friday Five. And guess what? You can too! Questions come from here, so feel free to take part if you wish. I may do this every Friday, I may do it for a few weeks and then get bored, or I may just do it this once and never mention it again.  You just never know with me, and that’s half the fun, only not really, obviously.

Anyway, on with the show. Here are today’s questions and my “have-you-on-the-edge-of-your-seat” answers:

1. Could you live without your phone for 1 week for $500?

Seriously, I could live without my phone forever for $500. In fact, I’d do it for free if it meant never having to talk on the phone again. That’s how much I hate the phone. And although I love my actual phone in a “hey, this is a pretty cool toy” kinda way, I only ever use the alarm on it to wake me up in the mornings and remind me to do things, and the camera to take pictures of my dog. And, OK, of that one time I decided to try out Amy Winehouse-style eyeliner. If I could work out how to blog from it, which I think may be technically possible, I would use it more, but yeah, I’d still take the $500. When can I get it?

2. Whom do you talk to on the phone the most?

Um, probably my mum, who has the distinction (and, dare I say, pleasure) of being the person I call any time strange medical symptoms befall me. I’m trying to cut back on this, though, because I know you wouldn’t think it, but it’s actually not much fun for anyone. I also sometimes call Terry’s answerphone (because his phone is rarely switched on, and when it is he’s normally left it in the car, in someone else’s home, or, on a couple of occasions, in the washing machine) if he’s been away from home for longer than I was expecting and leave him a message saying, “OMG ARE YOU DEAD? ARE YOU? CALL ME IF YOU’RE NOT DEAD!”

3. Whom do you no longer talk to on the phone but wish you still did?

I’ve actually never really been a “phoner”. I was never one of those teenagers who hogged the telephone line all night chatting to her friends, and this was because I didn’t have no friends. No, I’m joking, I did have friends, but for some reason we didn’t really call each other all that much, other than to make specific arrangements about stuff. Maybe if cellphones had been invented back then, things would’ve been different, but of course we had to use smoke signals in those days, which was a total drag.  So, in conclusion, I don’t think there’s anyone I used to phone but still wish I did. This is why we have email, surely?

4. If you could get ahold of one celebrity phone number, whose digits would you want?

Michael Stipe’s. I wouldn’t call him though, because I don’t think he would like that, and I wouldn’t know what to say to him, as I am Not Good On The Phone.  Also, he totally didn’t accept my Facebook friends request, so no phone calls for him. (Do you hear that? It’s the sound of Michael Stipe’s heart breaking…)

5. Do you talk on the phone more or less than you used to?

I think the answer to this is probably self-evident, no? In the early days of The Business, when I used to do a lot of freelance writing, I had to talk on the phone a LOT, because people would call me up and ask things, and then call me again and ask more things, and it was all talky-talky-talk. It was my version of Hell on Earth, although obviously not quite as bad as the call centre I used to work in. (If there is a hell, I’m totally convinced it looks EXACTLY like a call centre, seriously…) Now I’m all about the blogging, people tend to email rather than phone, and while this makes Amber a Very Happy Girl, it has also made me totally lose what little knack I had of using the phone. Which is why I answered the business line a few weeks ago with the words, “Hello! Hot Igloo speaking! Amber!”

OK,  your turn.  If you don’t want to answer in your own blog, feel free to answer in the comments section…