I’ll Be Your Wall. (Of clothes)

I’ve been talking in my sleep again, folks. In the early hours of Monday morning, for instance, I apparently rolled over in bed and said to Terry, “Don’t worry: I’ll be your wall!” Which is nice. Well, I mean, everyone needs a wall, don’t they? He can lean on me! Or… sit on me! Rubin can… well, probably pee on me, but you know, still nice.

Sadly for me, though, the only wall I have been encountering recently is the wall of clothing in my hallway:

The Great Wall of Clothing. Dog not included.

The Great Wall of Clothing. Dog not included.

Terry brought this little lot down from the attic for me on Sunday afternoon. What’s scary about this (other than the WOLF lying on top of it, obviously) is that this pile doesn’t even include all of the coats and jackets that are also up there. Whoops.

You see, because our house has approximately no storage whatsoever, I’m forced to actually DO that thing magazines are always advising you to do, whereby you kind of “rotate” your wardrobe, putting half of it into storage when the seasons change. I don’t really do it on a seasonal basis, because we don’t actually have seasons in Scotland, but at this time of year I will generally throw some of my winter coats up there, and also some other stuff that I have suddenly and inexplicably decided I can’t stand to give wardrobe space to for one second longer.

The idea, of course, is that in a few months time, I get it all back down again, and if I STILL don’t think I’ll wear the whatever-it-is that’s up there, I give it to charity. The problem with that though? Well, once my clothes go into the attic, they generally remain there for… well, forever. Because I basically forget what’s up there. Then I think to myself, “Oh, I really need a whatever-it-is!” and I go and buy one, forgetting that there’s already about twelve of them in the attic. I’d like to say this is why I have something like ten black sweaters/cardigans, but they weren’t even IN the attic, so I guess I’ll have to come up with another excuse for that one. Insanity, maybe.

Anyway, this Sunday I decided it was time to put an end to the madness. Two massive bags of Stuff went to the charity shop this morning, and a bunch of other Stuff was re-instated in my wardrobe, where it’s currently being given a Second Chance. I hope it doesn’t waste it.

Meanwhile, Terry installed a hanging pole in the top of the wardrobe in the office, and went out and bought these:

Coathangers FTW!

Coathangers FTW!

I like to hang things up. No, I mean, I REALLY like to hang things up. I’d hang up everything if I could. Even underwear. OK, maybe not underwear. But I try to hang as much as I possibly can: I hate folding because everything just ends up horribly creased (see Space: lack off) and also, I invariably end up just wearing the items from the top of the pile over and over again, then replacing them when they get old, while the stuff at the bottom just lies there, forgotten and lonely. This way at least I can see what’s actually there, get more use out of what I have, and hopefully nip that whole “black sweater” thing in the bud.

I can also go shopping. Because, obviously, that’s what all this was all about…


  • Lila says:

    That is so weird Amber, I’ve been doing this too but the opposite! Putting things up in the loft, my hall looked like that yesterday, had to buy big storage bags too put it all up..but it’s because I’m decorating the bedroom, the hangers are still on the floor cause I’m buying a new wardrope to hang everything in..didnt know I had so many hangers…oops..

  • Rubin is so cute in that picture, like he just popped out from under the piles.

    Doing the Clothing Heave always makes me wonder why I buy so many clothes that I never, or hardly ever, wear. And you're absolutely right – the whole point is to make room for more clothes.

    <abbr>Amanda Nicole´s last blog post..small graces: part 34</abbr>

    • Amber says:

      Yeah, it's an eye-opener all right. It made me swear off shopping for almost an entire day afterwards: all that stuff just sitting there unworn!

  • Hayley says:

    Maybe you meant wall along the lines of Wonderwall? Just a thought. Also, I would hang up nearly everything if I could as well. In fact, I’m going to choose my apartment when I move based on the amount of closet space.

    Hayley´s last blog post..This is how I roll.

    • Amber says:

      Oh me too: I've already warned Terry that our next house will have, not just a walk-in closet, but an entire spare bedrooom that will be tranformed into walk-in closet. I imagine it as looking a little bit like Mariah Carey's closet, but without all the lycra…

      • Camilla says:

        Mariah Carey hangs her underwear I'll have you know. She has an entire closet devoted to it. I knew that knowledge would bring you joy and also, yes, I have to stop watching such crap TV.

        <abbr>Camilla´s last blog post..Living room makeover (in my head)</abbr>

  • Rock Hyrax says:

    I hope you don't have the same effect on the weather as I do: last summer the weather turned bad the day after I rotated my boots/sandals. Then, when I failed to put the sandals away again for winter (well, I didn't get the chance to wear them), we got the heaviest snow for twenty years.

    I love the look on Rubin's face btw!

    • Amber says:

      This is always my fear: so far the sun has remained out, but I've just checked the forecast for the Easter weekend, and it looks like rain. Am sure this is my fault for putting all of my winter stuff into storage!

  • Tracey says:

    Please show me a photo of your shoe collection.

    • Terry says:

      Don’t say that! Then I will have to go back into the attic to find her boxes of shoes and boots 😛

      • Amber says:

        It's all over the place at the moment, to be honest, but Terry has a cunning plan to make it easier for me to organise my shoes, and when he puts it into action, I will take photos!

  • Sunehra says:

    I constantly give away my clothing because of no space and I wish I hadn't!

    <abbr>Sunehra´s last blog post..Nylon Scare</abbr>

    • Amber says:

      Me too: I think this is why I hang onto it for so long – as soon as I decide to get rid of something I can always guarantee I will regret it a week later!

  • Geo says:

    I think; even if women had an office block for a wardrobe this still wouldn’t be enough space for clothes, handbags, shoes, toiletries, underwear, socks, office stationary, out of date colanders, stapler’s, stacks and stacks of various unread books, oh, and the kitchen sink. Well I had to let steam off from somewhere?

  • Geo says:

    Oh, the colanders should be Calanders, mind you she does have a few of those under the kitchen sink too, come to think of it !

  • Kelley says:

    Wow, I'm kind of envious. It must be nice to have so many clothes to choose from every day!

  • Nina says:

    You got me laughing quite a bit with that post :) And thank you so much for the bday wishes, I am indeed honoured that you do apparently check my blog from time to time :) thank you!!

    <abbr>Nina´s last blog post..23 yesterday</abbr>

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