Almost Ill

As my mother would say, I seem to be “hanging” with some kind of illness. This is Scottish-speak for “Why, I fear I may be about to become ill, but it hasn’t quite happened yet.” While I wait for it to arrive, I get to live in that horrible limbo-land of Almost Ill: I have a slightly sore throat, a little bit of a cough, a runny nose that isn’t really running very far, and a general feeling of almost-illness. I’ve been feeling like this for two days now: not quite ill enough to justify taking to my bed with a pile of trashy novels, but just ill enough to make sure that getting through my working day is much less comfortable and much more annoying than it really should be. And I know, beyond doubt, that if Actual Illness is in the post, it will wait until I finish work on Friday to arrive, so that I don’t get any time off work, but I do get my weekend ruined. So that’s something to look forward to! 

Still, at least it’s not the swine flu. I mean, I’m assuming it’s not the swine flu, anyway, because if it was, I’d presumably be feeling much worse than I am. I’m going to worry about it anyway, though. I’ve actually been worrying fairly obsessively about Swine Flu all year, and this is because Terry, being a transplant recipient, falls into that ominous-sounding “underlying health condition” category. And also because I, being a hypochondriac, fall into the “underlying mental issues” category.

We’re both on the list for the vaccination when it becomes available. Terry is in one of the priority groups because his immune system is compromised (I like to say this in  Jack Bauer type of voice, by the way. “Mr President, the immune system has been compromised – I’m setting up a perimeter!”), and I’m also apparently in one of the priority groups because  I live with someone whose immune system is compromised. Terry says this is for the best – if I didn’t get the vaccination, I’d just whine about it, but, now, of course, I’m ALSO worried about the vaccination, because what if I have some kind of reaction to it, which, you know, kills me? WHAT IF, people?

Seriously, this is NOT a good time to be a hypochondriac, I’m telling you. I actually gave up reading/watching the news a while back, because I got so badly freaked out by all of the “OMG, WE ARE ALL GOING TO DIE BECAUSE OF THE SWINE FLU, OR POSSIBLY SOMETHING ELSE!” stories that seemed to be being written with no regard whatsoever for the fact that some of us are hypochondriacs, and only need to read about illness to start experiencing the symptoms of it. But somehow they still keep filtering through, and every so often I will click a link on Twitter or something and it will take me to a “news” story with the title “You Should Be Really Worried About the Swine Flu, Amber, We’re Not Joking”. And then I’ll be scared all over again.

For now, though, I’m pretty sure this is just a small dose of Almost Ill.  Good job we stocked up on Lemsip…