Me and my shadow. And my iPhone.

Quick swine flu update: Terry had the vaccination yesterday, and, much to my surprise, so did I. In fact, they gave me the vaccination for the regular flu at the same time, so I felt a bit like a walking pincushion. Contrary to what we were told last week, it turns out that a lot of people who’ve been offered the vaccine have turned it down, and it also seems that new supplies have arrived, so there now does seem to be enough go around, and thank goodness for that! Despite the dire warnings we’d read about the vaccine, we’re both absolutely fine – sore arms, but nothing more, so hopefully we will live!

Now, who wants a random act of stupidity? Oh. No one. Well, here’s one from last week, anyway:

So, picture it: I’m at the gym, plodding through a run on the treadmill, and thinking about the half-assed fancy dress “costume” I’m going to wear this weekend. (Because, yes, we’re going to another fancy dress party this weekend. Hee!) Suddenly, though, the music I’m listening to is rudely interrupted as something small and rectangular goes flying past my head and lands with a sickening crash on the floor behind the machine. I twist myself round, while still trying to keep running, and, whoops! It’s my iPhone!

I hit the “Emergency Stop” button on the treadmill, and do a kind of comedy lurch as I try to keep my balance while the machine shudders to a halt. Then I jump off, grab the phone, and, oh, miracle of miracles! It works!

So I get back onto the machine, re-set it and start running again, this time thanking my lucky stars that I DIDN’T just wreck my phone, and wondering how on EARTH I managed to throw it across the gym. The phone, you see, was sitting where it always sits: on the shelf at the front of the treadmill. It had never taken to the air before, and I was just pondering the theory that I must have somehow got my elbow caught in the headphone cable and kinda flicked it across the room, when…

My music cuts out suddenly and a small, rectangular object goes flying past my head.

WHOOPS. I. DID. IT. AGAIN.

I once again performed my comedy lurch, and once again rescued the phone, and I am both surprised and amazed – totally AMAZED – to report that, once again, it was still working. Not even a scratch! My reputation in the gym, however, was in tatters, because although it was fairly empty at the time, needless to say, everyone there was crowded around me like paparazzi. D’oh! 

(Oh, and just in case anyone thinks I exaggerate about this strange behaviour of The Others, my friend Mhairi goes to the same gym, and has noticed exactly the same thing. So either the folks there really are weird, or both Mhairi and I exert a powerful magnetism that draws Others to us like Rubin to a radiator.)

I did get back on the treadmill again, but I’d only been running for five minutes (with my eyes firmly fixed on my phone and my elbows clamped to my sides) when Bambi Girl arrived. Bambi Girl is my shadow at the gym. No matter what time of day I go there, she’s there. I think she might actually live there or something. And no matter which machine I choose to use, she chooses the one right next to it, or just one away. I’ve experimented with using different machines, just to see if this theory of mine holds true, and yup: it doesn’t matter which one I use, she’ll be right there next to me, like me and my shadow.  I call her “Bambi Girl” because after walking slowly for ten minutes or so, BG will suddenly ram the speed up on the treadmill, execute this weird kind of Bamb-like leap into the air, and then run for a few minutes before her twenty minute cooldown. It’s actually quite impressive.

Not as impressive as my iPhone-flicking maneouvre, though.  I think The Others will have to go quite some way to beat THAT one…


13 Comments

  • Great news about the vaccine! And the strange behvaiour of humans at the gym has turned me off from ever joining one again. There are some WEIRDOS there.
    .-= Amanda Nicole´s last blog .. =-.

    • Amber says:

      There really are some strange people there: earlier this week I saw a woman dressed like one of the Pussycat Dolls – big hair, full makeup, the works. I'd never actually believed that people dressed like that for the gym, but there she was, and, as expected, she used one machine for two minutes and then left, still looking immaculate. I felt very underdressed :)

  • myra says:

    Glad u r glad u both got the vaccination – the reports i have read means it scares me – like the lack of testing and the possible side effects – leading to medical staff refusing to have it. Anyway, we are going to babysit Max this weekend and he is sick – temperature up to 39.5 but fluctuating, sleeping, not eating and a cough. The question now is do I go and take the risk I don't get swine flu or whatever he has, or go and hope he will be better by the time we get there?

    • Amber says:

      Hi Myra, sorry to hear Max is ill – poor soul! If it's any consolation, the nurse who gave us the injection said that for most people it seems to be a very mild flu, so if you did get it, I'm sure you'd both be fine (although obviously no one wants to get flu!). She was quite dismissive of what the media has been saying about the injection, too – I think there's been a lot of the usual scaremongering going on there. Terry and I have both been absolutely fine after having it – it gave us both a very sore arm, but nothing worse than that!

      Hope Max is feeling better soon!

  • Gem says:

    Bambi might be doing rehab. I did something similar when i had pelvic disfunction. To get running again i had to do an odd walk-run-walk thing, amd also relearn to run amd walk differently.

  • Mhairi says:

    Hi Amber

    So glad to hear you guys got your vaccines, just a bit rubbish that you had to put up with so much before getting it.

    I can definitely testify to "the others" at the gym. I was there on Tuesday morning (a completely alien concept for me as I am normally working) and there was this girl there looking like she was about to audition for a part in a music video or something. Complete with cut away leotard and everything.

    x

  • Tracey says:

    Really, I wish we could see video of the flying iPhone.
    .-= Tracey´s last blog ..The Pioneer Woman’s White Chicken Enchiladas =-.

  • I've been thinking about the swine flu vaccine myself but haven't as yet been offered it. I'm epileptic so am surprised they haven't let me know. Perhaps they don't think I need it urgently! Mind you, needles scare me to death anyway. Hope the iPhone is still working okay!

    CJ xx

    • Amber says:

      It might be worth giving your doctor a call and asking about it (assuming you decide you want to get it, that is) – if Terry hadn't called and asked, we probably wouldn't have gotten it either, or at least not for a while.

      And yes, I'm relieved to say that the phone is still going strong (although now that I've said that, it'll probably stop!).

  • Dana says:

    Oh my! You have a flying iPhone too? I only managed to make mine fly while getting out of the car, though. It survived too!

    As for the swine flu shot, we will be going to the States for New Years Eve, and we are thinking of doing it as well. BUT in Romania the vaccination campaign is quite unclear, it will start on December 1st, but nobody knows if you can buy the vaccine, or if only some people we'll receive it. Total chaos!
    .-= Dana´s last blog ..Shopping news: Noul catalog DECORIX.RO =-.

  • Kate says:

    I used to send my phone flying like that every time I went on the treadmill. Had to give up the gym in the end!

    Glad to hear you both got your jabs.

  • dressjunkie says:

    Your description of Bambi girl brought actual tears of laughter on this shitty morning :) Thanks for that xx

  • olivia says:

    good thing YOU didnt fall off! my friend Juliette was running on the tredmill (while i was there) and fell off and lost a tooth! oh my right! luckly the iphone is stronger than people!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>