So, I lost my sunglasses.

And yes, I know what you’re thinking. Other than, “Holy hell, is this woman going to lose EVERY. SINGLE. THING she owns?” I mean. (The answer to that, by the way, is surely “yes”. Yes, it would appear that I am. ) “So what?” you’re thinking. “It’s just a pair of sunglasses! It’s not like losing a dress, say. And it’s February, it’s not even sunny for God’s sake!”

You’re right, of course. It is just a pair of sunglasses, but the thing is: these were SPECIAL sunglasses. (Have you noticed how I always lose the spechul stuff, never the totally ordinary, take-it-or-leave-it stuff? Yeah, me too.) I got them on my honeymoon, as a “reward” for agreeing to almost kill myself on a quad bike, so they had sentimental value, and I LOVED them.

Also: I’ve been surgically attached to those sunglasses ever since I got them. I know I’ve probably mentioned this before once or twice or fourteen times, but my eyes are super-sensitive to sunlight, so I always, always have a pair of sunglasses with me. Or maybe three pairs:

The passenger seat of my car, last year

(Oh God. The pair at the very front? Is THE pair. The LOST pair. It makes me sad just to look at them. Where are you now, oh sunglasses? Where did you sleep last night? Is some other girl loving you the way I loved you? Or are you perhaps sleeping in a cardboard box somewhere, probably under a bridge near a railway station?)

You see, for years now (since I was a teenager, in fact) I’ve had this paranoia that I’ll be out somewhere and it’ll all of a sudden turn SUNNY, and I’ll be dazzled by it and, I don’t know, go blind or something. (On a more practical note, if it’s sunny AT ALL, I can’t drive without my sunglasses, and I also whine a lot. That last bit has nothing to do with the sunglasses, by the way, I just whine a lot.) So I carry my sunglasses everywhere, and because I wear them so much I am generally prepared to pay a bit more for a pair I really, really like. That’s what I did with these ones, and for the past three years, they have been my constant companions. They have been to America with me. They have been to Spain with me. They have been to… well, they’ve been to America and Spain, OK? They appear in almost every single one of my holiday snaps from the past three years, and I had optimistically thought that we would have many more happy years ahead of us, my big-ass sunnies and me.

And then yesterday I lost them. Because that’s what I do.

Actually, that’s not quite true. Well, the “losing stuff” bit IS true, but not the “yesterday” bit. Yesterday I found out that I’d lost them. I actually have no idea when I lost them, and this is because the horrible weather we’ve been having lately means that I can’t even remember when I last had to wear them. Unfortunately for me, the whole “carrying them with me at all times” thing means I could have lost them ANYWHERE. The handbag I use has two zips which both have to be closed to make it secure, and because I’m lazy, I normally don’t bother, which means it would’ve been all too easy for them to have fallen out somewhere. Especially when you consider that it’s ME carrying the bag.

So, yesterday was one of THOSE days, and by that I mean, “One of those days which Terry and I spend turning the house upside down as we hunt YET AGAIN for something I have lost.” We searched the house. We searched both cars. We searched in the rubbish bins. We called my parents and asked if I had, YET AGAIN left something at their house the last time I was there. We called Terry’s mum and asked if I had, YET AGAIN, left something at her house the last time I was there. Terry called the mall I went to last weekend and asked if anything had been handed in.

Nothing. Nada. Zilch.

Obviously, as the photo above shows, it’s not like I don’t have other, (albeit non-spechul) pairs I can wear for now, but seriously: how do I learn to stop losing stuff all the time? Is there some kind of a course you can take for that? Should I start tying all of my belongings to me with string (if I can find the string, that is), or should I just admit defeat and never leave the house ever again? I’m starting to think that might be the best idea

    1. Oh, I've lost count of the times I've almost lost sunglasses because of the "tucked in the top" trick! I'd guarded these ones really carefully up until now, though, so I could just KICK myself at my own carelessness now!

  1. Oh no, I feel for you! My eyes are also ridiculously sensitive to sunlight and I'd absolutely hate to lose my special sunglasses. Have to admit though, I often leave them at home on cloudy days because they come in a huge heavy case but I wouldn't want to transfer them to a squishy lightweight case because then they might get damaged.

    Have you looked yet in really stupid places like the freezer, the laundry basket, a box of computer equipment, that sort of thing? Also, under car seats – it's amazing how stuff can hide there without being found unless you practically crawl underneath them.

    1. Yup, we've searched absolutely everywhere: unfortunately we've been forced to become experts at searching for lost stuff over the past year or so – I just wish I could become an expert at not losing it in the first place!

      The thing is, my glasses also had a huge case, and I was pretty good about always returning them to it after I'd worn them, so they didn't get damaged. It's missing too, so the glasses are presumably in it, which means that they can't have gotten into any small hidey-places, because the case is too big. I fear they're gone for good 🙁

  2. Well, call me strange but I would never (ever) wear anyone else's glasses, sun or otherwise!! No offence but it's something I just can't do. Like I can't buy/use second hand crockery or cutlery (or shoes) – and always examine cutlery in restaurants – okay I'm creeping myself out here now – but no, it's new or nothing for me where those items are concerned.

  3. Ugh totally get it. I'm insanely photophobic AND suffer from the incureable lose-stuff-all-the-time disease, too. The fact that I have been working the graveyard shift for over a year and rarely see sunlight makes me wear dark shades even on the cloudiest of days. I remember the day I lost my fave Gucci sunglasses. I especially loved them because I found them at such a steal, $30 (no not a typo, thirty dollars). Currently my seeing glasses are MIA so I am forced to either remain blind or wear my very irritating contacts. Being that I am lazy and stubborn, I pretty much just stay in my blurry world. My husband has also become quiet the expert at locating my lost items. My grandmother always told me to pray to Saint Anthony because he helps people find things they have misplaced. That just might do the trick.

  4. If you find out how to stop losing stuff, please let me know. I lost ONE shoe four months ago, and I'm still sad when I see the other one. My husband wants to throw the other one away, but it was one of my favorite pairs, so I keep hoping (against logic) that the other one will magically appear some day.

    Seriously — I probably won't throw the other one away until I move.

    How do you lose ONE shoe, you might wonder? OK, twist my arm, and I'll tell you. It's a pair I keep at the office in the summer, as I commute in comfy flip-flops for walking to the train & back (OK, sometimes running wildly to CATCH my train). I had a wedding one weekend in October, and thought I might want to wear them, depending what dress I chose to wear. Well, the choice was made for me. As I was running for the train, with this pair of shoes in my open-top bag, one of them fell out somewhere between my office & the train station.

    I realized it immediately after I got on the train, so instead of carrying on to pick up my young children at school/daycare, I called my husband to ask him to go get them. The minute he agreed, I got off the train, and retraced my steps all the way back to my desk, but there was no sign of my lost shoe. I checked the lost & found office at the train station every day for about a week, but it never showed up.

    I even looked in public trash cans, in case someone found ONE shoe, assumed it was litter, and threw it away, but with no luck.

    So, if you find the solution to this problem, I do hope you'll share it with your readers.



    1. Oh, lordy! I have no solution (Although I'm REALLY hoping someone else will have!) but God, that sucks. I actually think that may possibly suck even more than losing something altogether, because you still have the other shoe there to remind you of your loss. Argh!

      (And I totally get why you'd keep the other shoe. When Rubin was a puppy, he totally destroyed one of my favourite shoes, to the point where it had to be thrown out, because it was rendered totally unwearable. And I… kept the other one. For YEARS. I just couldn't bring myself to part with it, no matter how many times Terry told me that, look, that shoe wasn't ever coming back. Sigh.)

      1. I was relieved to find the same pair on e-bay earlier this week, but in black. It's not nearly as beautiful as the tan one I lost, but I'm hoping it might bring me to the point where I can let the remaining tan one RIP.

        With sunglasses, I lose them all the time too. For that reason, I never spend more than $20 on them, so even when I lose a pair that I love, at least I don't lose much money at the same time, and I can easily justify buying 2 or 3 replacement pairs to console myself.

  5. Bummer… have to say I 'lose' things all the time but the OH usually manages to find them for me again (in about 2 seconds flat of looking). My recent loss however turned out not to be my fault though – he tidied away my power trousers (my trousers I wear to client meetings) with his trousers and I never thought to look in that drawer. Anyway, what I'm trying to say (in a v roundabout way) is maybe they'll turn up somewhere… somewhere insanely obvious if you're like me!
    .-= Zoe, Conversation Pieces´s last blog ..Weddingnesday… frills and flutterbys =-.

  6. God, you're not the only one – trust me. I've managed to lose the SAME pair of leather gloves twice in a fortnight. The first time, I found them in the sewing room, sitting on the floor, miraculously still together. The second time, I left them in a uni toilet cubicle, but thankfully someone turned them in to reception and I got them back.

    I hope that there is still a chance for your sunglasses. 🙁 My grandpa lost his glasses once and they turned up in the vegetable rack. And he lost a knife and it turned up IN A TREE outside – he'd been pruning the tree in spring and he found the knife still in the tree in autumn! There may still be hope for your lost sunglasses! 😛

  7. My boyfriend's grandmother, who was a bit forgetful and very nearly blind, was in the habit of tossing little bits of rubbish that she found on the carpet out of the window of her rest home unit. One day she complained that she'd lost the battery to her hearing aid, luckily my boyfriend's mum thought to check outside, sure enough there it was in the garden right outside the window!
    .-= Selina´s last blog ..Your daily dose of pretty: Forever 21Jocelyn Pump =-.

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