Serving Suggestion

Well, folks, last night, as I’m sure you know, was the night of The Oscars, which means I’ve been up all night drinking coffee and playing celebrity blogging monkey over at The Fashion Police, so I’m now feeling ever so-slightly hysterical.  I’m going to go and sleep for the rest of the week (I really don’t deal well with all-nighters. It throws my schedule out for DAYS. At university, I was never one of those students who would sit up all night before exams, studying. I’d just go to bed early and accept I would probably fail. That’s why I’m not a brain surgeon by now. Well, that and the fact that my degree was in English Literature.) but I didn’t want to leave you totally without posts to read this week, because then you would all unsubscribe immediately and never darken my blog again, and I’d have to get a real job, possibly down a mine, or sweeping chimneys, or something like that. So here is a photo of a bottle of sauce:

Sauce, bottle of

Weren’t expecting THAT, were you? And now you’re all, “WHUT? She thinks a blurry iPhone photo depicting a bottle of sauce is going to stop us unsubscribing? Well she is wrong, because I am unsubscribing rightthisverysecond. Sauce, indeed!”) And some of you, who don’t live in the UK, are probably all, “BROWN SAUCE? Is this some quaint little thing we can look down upon the Brits for, like Marmite and Hugh Grant?” And, well, you can if you want to, but it’s more or less the same as steak sauce. Only we have steak sauce too, so now I’m confused as well. Did I mention I’ve had quite a lot of coffee?

Anyway, the reason I’m showing you this bottle of sauce is because of the serving suggestion, which Terry pointed out to me last week:

Don't use the sauce

Do you notice anything that’s missing from this photo, readers? Yes, the BROWN SAUCE is missing. So, basically, their “serving suggestion” is “Don’t use this product! Just place three pieces of bacon on a slice of bread! It’ll be ace! But don’t add the sauce, whatever you do!” I think that’s even more inspired than the usual “put it on a plate” suggestions you tend to see on packaging, don’t you?

After writing this, I find myself quite fancying a bacon sandwich. Don’t worry, I won’t be adding any brown sauce to it…

14 Comments

  • Roisin says:

    Serving suggestions always crack me up. I think my favourite up until now has been the one on a box of Tesco breadsticks, depicting an open box of breadsticks. Their serving suggestion was to OPEN THE BOX. The person who comes up with them must have been having a bad day that day!

    • Amber says:

      Lol! That’s fantastic :) Did the photo of the box of breadsticks ALSO have a photo of a box of breadsticks on it? And did that one have a photo of a box of breadsticks too, and on and on into infinity? That’s kind of messing with my mind now…

      I’ve always wondered why they bother to add the words “serving suggestion” when it’s something as rubbish as that. I mean, OK, fine, if you just want to have a photo of the product, fair enough, but why call it a “serving suggestion” when most of them are just “open it” or “put it on a plate”?

      • katri says:

        I always thought it’s so that no one can complain that the product looks nothing like in the picture. “See, we’re only SUGGESTING the product looks like this when you attempt to eat it, it’s not our fault you couldn’t make it look the same!”

  • LOL! Hilarious! I can’t think of a good story like this, but I “like” the big letters on wine gums: “NO FAT!!” LOL. Yes of course, where on earth should it come from?

  • Carys says:

    Oh no, I was hungry beforehand but now aaaaaaall I want is a lovely bacon sandwich. Dammit.

    (I actually wouldn’t put Satan’s Sauce on my sandwich, so that is one accurate serving suggestion!)

  • Loozie says:

    Well I think they’ve got it right. Bacon is always going to be better without the brown sauce. ;)

    On another note, besides obvious serving suggestions. I was eating some cashew nuts and written on the packet, because is it really not that obvious? CONTAINS NUTS. Seriously?

  • Drea says:

    I love brown sauce so I will not be following their seving suggestion :D I have seen nut and crisp packets and their idea of a seving suggestion is just tipped out on the table, or what looks like it.

  • Nikki G says:

    Gah. I want some fries with HP sauce NOW!

  • Kerry says:

    Amber, this is why we love you.

  • BWC says:

    Ahahaha!
    My friend owns a water bottle that bears the warning: ‘KEEP OUT OF CHILDREN’.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>