Well, folks, last night, as I’m sure you know, was the night of The Oscars, which means I’ve been up all night drinking coffee and playing celebrity blogging monkey over at The Fashion Police, so I’m now feeling ever so-slightly hysterical. I’m going to go and sleep for the rest of the week (I really don’t deal well with all-nighters. It throws my schedule out for DAYS. At university, I was never one of those students who would sit up all night before exams, studying. I’d just go to bed early and accept I would probably fail. That’s why I’m not a brain surgeon by now. Well, that and the fact that my degree was in English Literature.) but I didn’t want to leave you totally without posts to read this week, because then you would all unsubscribe immediately and never darken my blog again, and I’d have to get a real job, possibly down a mine, or sweeping chimneys, or something like that. So here is a photo of a bottle of sauce:
Weren’t expecting THAT, were you? And now you’re all, “WHUT? She thinks a blurry iPhone photo depicting a bottle of sauce is going to stop us unsubscribing? Well she is wrong, because I am unsubscribing rightthisverysecond. Sauce, indeed!”) And some of you, who don’t live in the UK, are probably all, “BROWN SAUCE? Is this some quaint little thing we can look down upon the Brits for, like Marmite and Hugh Grant?” And, well, you can if you want to, but it’s more or less the same as steak sauce. Only we have steak sauce too, so now I’m confused as well. Did I mention I’ve had quite a lot of coffee?
Anyway, the reason I’m showing you this bottle of sauce is because of the serving suggestion, which Terry pointed out to me last week:
Do you notice anything that’s missing from this photo, readers? Yes, the BROWN SAUCE is missing. So, basically, their “serving suggestion” is “Don’t use this product! Just place three pieces of bacon on a slice of bread! It’ll be ace! But don’t add the sauce, whatever you do!” I think that’s even more inspired than the usual “put it on a plate” suggestions you tend to see on packaging, don’t you?
After writing this, I find myself quite fancying a bacon sandwich. Don’t worry, I won’t be adding any brown sauce to it…