Yesterday we did something else I’ve wanted to do for years: went swimming on horseback, by which I mean the horses went swimming and we, er, sat on their backs. Or, in the case of Terry, the horse went swimming but dumped Terry in the water first, so he got to go swimming too. (He wasn’t hurt – one of the advantages of riding in the water, I guess…)
No photos of this, of course, because:
a) we were on horseback
b) in the water
c) as we rode along the beach prior to our swim, I noticed a little crab scuttling along the sand, and it took me most of the rest of the day to calm down after this sighting of one of my mortal enemies. Later that day I saw another small, crab-like creature ON A FENCE. Climbing. OH MY HOLY HELL THEY CAN FLY. On later reflection, I was persuaded by my parents and Terry that this was not actually a crab I’d seen, but, well, I will leave it to you to imagine how freaked out I was. GOD.
Anyway, after the horse riding, we went to Caladesi Island, which was voted the best beach in the US in 2008. Something else must’ve won this year, but we don’t talk about that. It’s the most perfect beach, though, with gorgeous warm, turquoise water and miles and miles of white sand, which you get to by boat even although it’s no longer technically an island:
Because it’s a state park, they only allow a limited number of people to be there at any given time, and there are miles of beach, so you feel like you have the place more or less to yourself. Which allows you to do stuff like this:
And then we came home and I slipped into something a little less comfortable to drink WINE:
(Yes, I am wearing a hoodie. Because the air con here is always absolutely freezing. It’s actually been a little better this year than on previous trips, but it’s still cold enough indoors to make me have to wrap up, especially in restaurants, where I’m convinced they make it freezing on purpose to get you in and out faster.)
Tagged christian louboutin, florida, horses, I hate crabs, jumping
… because I’m just too busy relaxing and enjoying the sunshine. I am, however, still jumping:
Just not as well as Terry is:
(Taken in front of the Rock n Rollercoaster at Hollywood Studios). I still have another few days to beat him though…
Tagged disney, florida, jumping
 …and as usual, I was just a little bit overdresed for it. Terry, meanwhile, got in some jumping practice:
(Photoshopping courtesy of Terry!)
Tagged christian louboutin, florida, polka dot, retro
 We tried to get the dolphin to do YMCA with us, but at least one of us couldn’t spell…
This was the most amazing experience, and something I’ve wanted to do for years. It was worth every penny, too, and we were in the water with the dolphins for about 30 minutes, which gave us plenty of time to play with them. (Don’t tell Rubin, though: he gets jealous…)
Also, Terry has complained that the last “jumping” shot I posted here wasn’t an accurate reflection of his mad jumping skillz, so I would like to submit the following into evidence:
Let the record show that Terry can, in fact, jump much higher than me. He can’t keep his tongue in his mouth when he does it, though, and I can. I’ll beat him next time 
Tagged dolphins, florida, jumping
So, Neiman Marcus had a sale on…
Whoops.
I also got a Sephora Loyalty Card. You’d think that would be absolutely useless to me given that I live in a country Sephora doesn’t ship to, but nope, I already qualified for the free gift:
(note: that’s not the free gift. The free gift was a Benefit BadGal mini mascara. Sweet.)
Yesterday we took Terry and my dad for their joint birthday treat (they both had birthdays the week before we came out here):
That’s them. You’ll just have to take my word for it.
They did the parasailing at Disney, so I got to see Mickey briefly:
I wasn’t actually drunk at the time. I just looked it.
We also took a train ride, which came complete with sunset, and also: wine. Very cool.
Tomorrow, though, the thing I’ve been looking forward to most about this trip: swimming with dolphins, yay! Meanwhile, a good time is being had by all:
But especially by me and Terry:
Tagged christian louboutin, florida, jumping, sephora, shoes, Things I Bought
This morning we got up early and watched the sun rise:
Needless to say, I’m really, really happy to be back…
Tagged florida, jumping
Well, it’s our last full day in Florida. I’m sad. And also: totally and utterly depressed, because who wants to go back to the Kingdom, United when you can have the Kingdom, Magic? Not me.
(Why, yes, I did wear pretty much the same outfit to every park…)
The Happiest Place on Earth totally lived up to its rep (and huge thanks to The Parentals here for treating us to the trip, on account of how Sephora now has all of my money, and various retailers across central Florida have Terry’s), and was every bit as… magic… as I remembered it. My love of the Magic Kingdom has absolutely nothing to do with the rides inside the park (Especially not It’s a Small World), and everything to do with the atmosphere and appearance of the park. It’s just a little, perfect place, and it feels like nothing bad could ever happen there. Unlike, say, an airport. Or where we live. So, yes, it was all very magic indeed. Especially this bit:
I swear this picture is not photoshopped. And that even the Splash Mountain staff (sorry, cast members) laughed as they sold it to us. Just call me The Joker. Call Terry “crazy”. Moments after this photo was taken, my mouth ate my entire head. For real. (I’ve actually been having nightmares about Splash Mountain for years now, so this was actually a brave move for me, indeed. See “I don’t like steep drops“, for reference. Totally worth it, though, if only for this picture.)
So, yes, it’s the last day, and I’m now off to sit by the pool and feel sorry for myself while worrying about airplane crashes. We fly out tomorrow evening, so if this is the last entry you ever read here, my worst fears were probably realised. Rest assured, though, that I will not be leaving Florida without a few small mementos:
Tagged disney, florida, hoiday, magic kingdom
Hello, loyal reader, who has bravely remained with this blog through all of the “What I did on my summer vacation” posts! As a reward for your loyalty, here is a picture of the GLAST (no, I don’t know what it means either) rocket taking off from Kennedy Space Centre, on a day that may or may not have been this Wednesday. (What day is this? Where am I? Who am I?)
Thanks to my mad photography skillz, it’s almost like you were there, no? Say it is like you were there. Actually, being there was pretty cool – much more so than this crappy photo suggests. We were standing on a piece of scrub land right next to the highway on the approach to Cape Canaveral (We go to all the best places when we vacation), and the view was about as good as it gets without the type of security clearance they’re just never going to give the likes of me. Especially not if “they” read my blog…
There were a couple of dozen other people there, most of whom seemed to be rocket nerds (I say that in the nicest way possible, by the way, because they were all very lovely), and one guy counted down to blast off for us all through a loud hailer. A couple of military helicopters circled us constantly, which made it all feel a bit like an episode of 24, and when the rocket finally went up, it appeared to rise silently into the sky, followed a few seconds later by a rumble that grew and grew until it got to be really quite freaky. Which was cool.
After the launch, we drove to Cocoa Beach, where we managed to finally defeat the East Coast Curse which has dictated for years now that any time we try to take Terry to the Space Coast, it will pour with rain. The weather stayed warm enough for us to take a swim (the water was so warm it was hard to believe it was the same Atlantic Ocean that washes up against the UK. Back home, you wouldn’t even paddle in it without Wellington boots. And actually, probably not even then.) and for me to get a sunburn on my nose, which has led Terry to refer to me as “Rudolph” ever since.
Anyway, the rain stayed off until yesterday, when we drove down to Tampa Bay to go to Busch Gardens. It had been … um, 14 years… since I’d last been to Busch Gardens, and about the only thing that was familiar about it was the animals, who were really pleased to see us:
Blue tongue! Blue tongue! RUN!
(Note: Blue from cotton candy. Not strange tropical disease. But looks like it.)
After about an hour or so, though, the rain came on and basically closed down the park. Not before Terry and my dad managed to ride most of the (totally terrifying) coasters, though…
My dad took the opportunity to have a quick snooze on this one. He is famous for his ability to sleep anywhere, at any time. Terry, not so much. Oh, and speaking of coasters, I found the evidence of my one, never-to-be-repeated attempt at one (from last week) tucked away on my mum’s memory card:
Hee!
After that it rained, and it rained, and it rained a little more. And so we shopped. And I didn’t really buy anything other than half of the Benefit counter and some more workout gear, because seriously, that’s a LOT of food they like to give you over here. Terry did manage to win a couple of Barts (now there’s a phrase you don’t say every day) to add to the little Simpsons family we’ve got lined up for Rubin to eat when we get home:
The Barts are bigger than the Homer because they ATE ALL THE FLUFF.
Today we went to Downtown Disney. You know, for the MAGIC.
Two Princesses. I am the one on the right. (Disney: call me!)Aaaand… that’s about it. Tomorrow, though: MAGIC KINDGOM! OMG! THE HAPPIEST PLACE ON EARTH. And actually? That whole “Happiest place on earth” thing? Is totally true. I LOVE the Magic Kingdom. Love it. Haven’t been since 2001 (although before that I’d been more times than I care to remember), and am now so excited I may throw up any second. Although, that could be the wine.
Anyway, I’m off to bed now to make tomorrow come faster. And to eat FLUFF, obv…
Tagged florida
Well, I totally found a cure for my current state of stress – or rather Erin (henceforth known as "The Voice of Temptation") has found it. It’s handbags, folks. Yes, handbags. Y’all totally thought I was going to say "shoes" didn’t you? Well, don’t think I didn’t consider it. But, although shoes are the main love of my life (man, I hope Terry doesn’t read this), I also love (and write about) handbags. So it was with no small excitement that, having just finished watching Neighbours this afternoon (Paul Robinson does have a brain tumour by the way, just as Doctor Amber predicted. Which makes me think: I wonder if I might have a brain tumour? Are red weals a sign of brain tumours?* Why, I think my head’s starting to hurt just thinking about this..) I retired to the office to find an email from The Voice of Temptation.
"Handbags" wrote Erin. "On sale." Actually, she wrote more than that, and in a proper, joined-up sentences kind of way, because she is like that. But "handbags" and "sale" were the words that jumped out at me. By the time I got her email, Erin had already bought four of said handbags for herself. I was soon to beat her spending total, though, for within minutes of hitting up that website and with just a few little clicks of the mouse, I had bought myself this:
God, I really hope Terry doesn’t read this.
No, I jest. Terry knows. And, faced with the choice of living with either Stressed-Out-Amber or Happy-Amber-Who-Also-Has-a-New-Handbag, he even agreed that yes, we can totally give up food for a while. We can eat next year or something. Anyway, I really needed a new bag for my laptop (YES IT IS A LAPTOP BAG. IT IS TOTALLY A LAPTOP BAG. Shut up.) because – *casually inserts dramatic news in a post about handbags* – we are going to Florida in two weeks time.
Yes! Florida! Party in the city where the heat is on!All night on the beach ’til the break of dawn! We’re goin’ to Miami! Welcome to Miami! (Note: totally not goin’ to Miami. Well, I mean, we will be goin’ to Miami, but only for the day. But still.) Anyway, I wasn’t going to mention this here on the blawg because, well, there are some funny people out there, y’know? But then I bought my new laptop bag and Ithought, "Hey! I could take my laptop with me and liveblog my trip!" Because everyone will love that, right? So, yes, Florida at the end of the month. Leaving from Glasgow airport, which was recently targeted by terrorists. Flying in to Sanford, where a plane recently missed the runway and crashed into some houses. Did I mention I’m frightened of flying?
On the other hand: Sephora! Anthropologie! Nordstrom! I really shouldn’t have bought a new handbag laptop bag!
Tagged florida, handbags, stress
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